Compared to years ago, I would really say that I'm in a good place now. I am surrounded by so many people who genuinely loves me. I am no longer clueless about who I am and what I want. Of course there are challenges too, they are present in every stage of life. I don't know how confident I am to say I am now better equipped to fight those challenges. Every challenge is so new and different from before, the stresses still piles up. But I got people around me to root for me in no matter what I do. Whenever I feel down, I have someone to fall back to.
As of now, I'm an unemployed fresh graduate who's fighting to score a job. I admit I'm not giving my all in this fight, but I am giving my best. When you send out as many resumes as you can possibly manage and still don't hear from any, your esteem takes damage. It makes you wonder, 'Have I spent my past few years in vain?' 'Why is my efforts not getting acknowledged?'. Everyone tell you it's a process, that the beginning is tough and you should strive on till the opportunity comes to you. I know, of course I know that's what I need to do; of course I know I got to chin up. But it's easier said than done.
Sometimes I get so stressed out, scrolling through job postings and realise that my qualification almost never appears under the 'requirements' heading. In my head, I never regret choosing my major despite feeling a twinge of bitterness. I've been told from the beginning that a degree qualification of my major will not get me anywhere; and it seems that these words are becoming a terrifying truth. It saddens me that my qualification still over weighs my passion to make a change, but I know that this is how the society works.
I am glad and I feel fortunate; because there will always be someone cheering me on in times like these. It could be a warm embrace from my boyfriend, where he'd pet me on the head and listen to my sorrows. It could also be my loving and supportive family who encourages me and cheer me on. I am blessed with these bliss; and I am absolutely grateful for the love I receive. It keeps me going.
